MAJOR MEA CULPA

Ok, I've made a huge error. I'm not sure where to place the blame. At first I thought my dam eyes were to blame. But the mistakes were too consistant and frequent for that. I mean I know I'm old, senile, can't see or hear to well and my memory is going to hell in a hand basket, but other than that I'm in pretty good shape!

I discovered the error when I was posting the updated "TNP Standings at a glance". Stevie's points from last night didn't jive with the totals the spreadsheet said he should have. Now, I can see me doing it once or twice, but not for most of the weeks since we started. It's possible this happens when I send the report, via email, to my work computer. I have Microsoft Office at work and Microsoft Works at home. There may be something happening when the programs convert from one to the other.

So at lunch I started going back and checking the spreadsheet against the written paper copies. I noticed Stevie and Tanner's points had been transposed. Not just last week, but for most of the weeks since we started keeping records. Not only that, but Nick's points have been transposed with Chris'.

Therefore I'm having Adam audit my records tomorrow just to double check my corrected records. My sincere apologies to everyone who trusted me to maintain honest, accurate scores, but especially to Stevie, Tanner & Nick. Believe me when I say this was totally unintentional and from now on I'll have a second person check me before the scores are posted. The new results posted are preliminary pending the results of Adam's audit. I invite anyone who wishes to conduct their own audit to do so.

The Mothman Prophecies

Unaware of her clairvoyance, Deb inadvertantly called the heads up game long before it was even close. And Jake dodged his hit, making even Tony Soprano pale in comparison. And Nick & I were destroyed often & early. Few particpants lead to only one table and few points, but they were enough to upset the status quo. So let's just get this over with!

TABLE 1 / FINAL TABLE
Stevie
Nick
Deb
Crystal
Stevie
Jeff
Jake


Getting queen after queen after queen after queen, Nick finally succumbed to the inevitable and settled for 1 point. Now you might think getting that many queens wouldn't be so bad. Trouble was it was always dealt with a 2, 3, 4 or 5 and always off suit.

I didn't fare much better. Hoping to close the gap with Deb before she leave next, just the opposite happened. My early exit and her excellent performance only widened the gap, all but insuring her continued lead for next week. I added 2 to my total.

Foiling Markus' plans and improving on his performance over the past few weeks, Jake did much better and earned 3 points.

Crystal came out of the starting blocks like gang busters! Her quad 8s, if I'm not too badly mistaken, garnered her a LOT of chips. It kept her in the game for a long time, but she wasn't able to capitalize on her early successes and ended with 4 points. Still, she did win the poll and is now behind Nick.

Playing his usual slow pace, Wes had a much improved night compared to his last outing. He put me out with a better 2 pair, and held the chip lead for most of the night. His luck ran out late however and he had to settle for 5 points.

I've never seen Deb crash like she did last night. I'm not talking her game or the cards she was getting. She literally had to fight to stay awake. She tried Coke, coffee, splashing water on her face, going outside for fresh air. Nothing worked. So when the heads up was determined after Wes was eliminated, she immediately conceded the game and was satisfied with 7 points.

Stevie, having survived an all in and fighting back from near elimination when the blinds were raised won the night and took home 9 points. More importantly, because Tanner was attending his brother's graduation, was able to slip past his b/f and take sole possession of 3rd place.

Here's the night according to the numbers:
7. Nick 1
6. Jeff 2
5. Jake 3
4. Crystal 4
3. Wes 5
2. Deb 7
1. Stevie 9

Next week is "let's eat" week, celebrating Adam's birthday, plus any elses birthday, anniversarys or whatever. I'm grilling polish sausage, brats, pork chops. I need someone to bring baked potato salad from United and if we want some corn on the cob. Also we need a cookie/cake. So, until next week, may all your cards be live and your pots be monsters! Mothman Monsters!

The Godfather Part II

No visit this week, just a phone call and a chilling message. "You know what to do". Markus again. He's working and has put out another hit on Jake. Last week's was extremely successful. Can lightening strike twice? Deb has built up a sizeable lead and looks assured of maintaining the top spot. Stevie is closing in on Tanner, and Tanner is just looking to improve over his performance from the past 2 weeks. Adam is LOST tonight, so no royal flushes from him. Nick should easily pass him by. Crystal, looking for good cards and a little respect, Justin hoping to capitalize on his outstanding playing last week. As for me, I'm just trying to stay close to Deb and dodge the bullets as the hits just keep coming, week after week.

I'm ready for my close up Mr. Demille

Videos from TNP May 22, 2008.

Palm Reading

How'd we do? Let's see.

Yep, Deb is still on top.

Stevie's within 6 now, so if this trend continues.....

With LOST's season finale next week, Nick had better make a move. This one is still yet to be determined.

It would appear that everyone is jealous of Crystal's buxom bosom. Ugh, not me!

Dam gays!

So, once again, we seem to be pretty good at this. Maybe Nielson or Zogby or some other polling company should be asking us about important stuff!

Wonder Woman!

What a night last night was! Not only did we have a straight flush, courtesy of Justin, but we had the hand of hands, the mother load, an over the top killer hand from Adam. What hand you ask? Well, a Royal Flush of course! So, let's get to it, shall we?



We had 9 players, assembled thusly:

TABLE 1
Crystal
Stevie
Tanner
Justin

TABLE 2
Deb
Jake
Adam
Nick
Jeff

It would seem Markus finally had something go right this week. For while he was unable to attend, the hit he put out on Jake was extremely successful. Jake just couldn't get any cards and was deep sixed with only 1 point.

The next shocker came when last weeks victim of a hit job took another hit this week. Tanner was out next with 2 points, leaving himself vulnerable from Stevie's advancing charge!

Crystal, sporting a new doo, which I might add looked really good, was next to exit with 3points. Her departure set the stage for the final table.

FINAL TABLE

Looking to avenge his unceremonious dismissal last week at the hands of Stevie, Nick even had some help from his 4 legged daughter, Leila, but she got sick, puked on his leg and that was the end of Nick for the night. He took home 4 points.

Hoping to close the gap with Deb, I fell short and ended the night with 5 points, thanks to a resurgent Justin and his pocket Aces! Dam gays!

Speaking of which, Justin was out next. Mark dropped by after he got off work to check on his lover. Justin was doing just fine, thank you very much! Not only did he have a straight flush, (only thing straight about him), but he also survived several all ins and earned 6 points for his efforts. Look out Crystal!

When it came down to 3, Stevie had to be an early odds on favorite. His recent performance has been spectacular, and his sizable chip stack gave him an advantage. However, the cards turned against him and he had to leave the table with 7 points, drawing to within 6 of Tanner. Next week should be interesting!

Making the heads up match, for the first time this year if I'm not too badly mistaken, was Adam. Suffering from a lack of sleep, he nevertheless had what was the most exciting hand of the night. Slow playing, as he always does, his 4 to the flush from the flop, he kept calling Stevie's big bets. When it finally came to the river, after already having his flush, he hit the jack pot! Royal Flush in clubs! This critically wounded Stevie and helped Adam garner 9 points. Congrats Adam!

Now if you had polled anyone standing around the table when the final 3 started, the overwhelming response would have been "Deb hasn't got a chance in hell!". Her very short chip stack just kept being whittled away, and all seemed lost. But, slowly, methodically, she began working her way back into contention. I warned both Stevie & Adam, having played this consumate professional many, many times in the past, to be cautious about allowing her back into the game. Yet, try as they might, her persistant aggressive play and gifts from the poker gods in the form of good hands turned the tide that was against her and for the third time this year she won a TNP, perhaps her most impressive yet. So, to Wonder Woman, we alot 11 points, her 4th week in a row at #1 and the respect she's earned. Here's the game according to the numbers.

9. Jake 1
8. Tanner 2
7. Crystal 3
6. Nick 4
5. Jeff 5
4. Justin 6
3. Stevie 7
2. Adam 9
1. Deb 11

Look for pictures and video from last night's game to be posted this evening. In 2 weeks, we'll have our monthly feast. I've been informed that Deb will be unable to attend that night, so if anyone want's to volunteer to bring United's baked potato salad, leave me a comment. Not only will she not be there to eat, but this will provide me an opportunity to make up lost ground. Course, I'll be gone the following week so everything evens out in the end. Until next week, may all your cards be live and your pots be monsters!

This weeks winner, Deb!

The Godfather

While waiting to leave for yoga last night, I received a visitor. This man kept his identity hidden from me. In a low, raspy voice, he said, "I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse." Swallowing hard, gripped with fear, I simply sat there and waited for this mysterious stranger to continue. "I've heard of your successful hit on Tanner last week. I've got someone I'd like taken out first this week. Here's his picture. Don't fail me!" As he departed, he shoved a picture of Jake into my hands. Instantly, I knew who this sinister mobster was. MARKUS! It had to be. What have I done? I mistakenly posted a poll last week in which I stated Markus had taken a slight lead over Jake. Now, to keep that false lead, Markus has put out a hit on Jake! Last week, while Tanner wasn't first out, myself, Deb & Stevie initiated a hit on him. He was 3rd out so our plot was mostly sucessful. Now Markus wants the same thing done to Jake. Consider this your warning Jake, we'll be gunning for you tonight!

Poker 101

Rules of Poker Etiquette

Cordiality
Be polite.
Do not swear or be verbally abusive.
Be modest when you win.
Refrain from criticizing another player's play.
Limit unnecessary chatter to avoid disturbing active players.
Do not hit on another player, or the dealer, no matter how attractive you find them.
Be kind to the dealer. Good karma brings good cards.

Table Presence
Manage your table space reasonably.
Keep your chips and/or money on the table.
Do not handle another player's chips or cards.
Do not stack chips in a way that interferes with the deal, the viewing of cards, or another player.
Chips and/or money on the table are not to be transferred from one player to another.
Protect your cards so that no one else can see them.
Keep your cards on the table. Holding cards against your shirt or putting them in your pocket or lap is not allowed.
It is proper for an opponent to complain when a player consistently has the opportunity to see another player's hole cards. It is improper to complain when someone exercises this right.
If you step away from the table, please advise the dealer of your intentions.

Play
Play at a reasonable speed.
It is each player's responsibility to follow the flow of the game. Play in turn. Do not act out of turn.
At no time should any player or spectator make statements that could unfairly influence the play of a hand.
Do not comment about the cards you just threw away.
Refrain from making comments about possible hands. "The board just paired. Someone could have a full house now!".

Betting
Do not splash the pot.
Do not string bet.
Verbally announce your action, particularly in games with non-professional dealers.
Chips and discards should be placed as far forward as reasonably possible to make it easier for the dealer to handle them.
When discarding your hand, do so towards the dealer at a low level of flight so that no other player can see what you have discarded.
Do not expose any cards until the showdown.

The Showdown
Do not mis-declare your hand.
Show your winning hand quickly. Do not "slow-roll" (allow your opponent to think he's won when you know he hasn't).
Rabbit hunting (asking to see what cards would have appeared, had you bet) should not be allowed.

Integrity
Every player must play in their own self interest. Do not "soft play" any other player(s).
Agreeing to "check-down" a hand after a player has gone All-in is not allowed.
Coffee-housing (speaking during a hand for strategic purposes) is allowed in North America but please exercise restraint.
Asking to see called hands unnecessarily is bad manners, a waste of time, and is generally bad for the game.

For everything, there is a first time.

And Friday night it was Justin's first time to win! Although it was not an officially sanctioned TNP event, it was poker nevertheless, and amongst a very large field. So congrats to Justin on your first win! Let's see if you repeat it Thursday night!

Reading the tea leaves

How well did last week's polls predict last night's outcome? Let's see!

Deb did indeed remain in 1st place for the third week in a row. `/

Tanner is still 19 points out of first, and with only 2 games left in this month, while it's not impossible, it's highly unlikely he'll take first by then, so this one gets an X.

Crystal, while not exploding out of her rut, did pull ahead of Jake by 1, so we'll give this one to Crystal. `/

While the votes went to Justin on this one, since Mark wouldn't let him play, Markus ended the tie and now leads Justin. X

Dam gays!

And it looks like the majority would rather keep the scoring the same for heads up tournaments as our regular TNP. Fine with me, makes it that much more difficult for the rest of you to catch Deb, Tanner & I!

Poker 101

Adam found an excellent web site, including tips, rules, even a timer! So, I think I'll start reprinting articles here. Here's the link if you want to explore on your own.
http://www.homepokertourney.com/ Otherwise, I'll reprint topics, from time to time, or you can submit questions. Enjoy!

Here are a couple of topics I found timely and interesting.

Heads-up Play
Who is the button when heads-up?
When there are only two players remaining in a poker tournament - the small blind is the button and acts first before the flop and last after the flop. The player who does not have the button is dealt the first playing card.


Poker String Bets
"The purpose of the string bet rule is to stop a player from “calling,” receiving information from his opponent’s reaction, then adding more chips to change the wager to a raise. If a player obviously is trying to raise the pot and puts in almost enough chips to raise, this should be treated as if he has announced a raise, and he should be required to put in the small remaining amount to make the wager correct." Bob Ciaffone

Call and Raise
A classic poker scene that you see repeated over and over again in the movies ... a grizzled, cigar-smoking poker player of about 60 years old is sitting at a poker table. The action is on him. Another player has made a bet of $100. The grizzled old poker vet looks at his hole cards, he's usually leaning back in his chair in a cloud of smoke, and states ...
"I'll call your $100 and raise you another $500" That, my friends, is a string bet and is illegal. You might see it happen in movies, but you should never see it allowed in a casino. You can't call and raise at the same time. You can call ... or you can raise - but you can't do both. As soon as the grizzled old player said "I'll call your $100" - he called and can no longer raise. The fact that he said "raise" just after he said "call" is meaningless - he verbally stated call before he verbally stated raise.
Robert's Rules - Section 3 - Betting & Raising8. A verbal statement denotes your action and is binding. If in turn you verbally declare a fold, check, bet, call, or raise, you are forced to take that action.

A string bet is a bet that is not done in one motion - it is "stringed out" or "stretched out" too long. You can't call and raise at the same time just like you can't fold and raise at the same time! You are only allowed one 'action' when the action is on you.

Placing Your Raise Into the Pot
There are also rules about how you must place your chips into the pot when you make a raise. The rules differ, depending on whether you are playing in a cash game or a tournament.

Robert's Rules - Section 3 - Betting & Raising 6. At non-tournament play, a player who says "raise" is allowed to continue putting chips into the pot with more than one move; the wager is assumed complete when the player’s hands come to rest outside the pot area. (This rule is used because no-limit play may require a large number of chips be put into the pot.)

In tournament play, the TDA rules require that the player either use a verbal statement giving the amount of the raise or put the chips into the pot in a single motion, to avoid making a string-bet.
Robert's Rules - Section 15 - Tournaments 24. At pot-limit and no-limit play, the player must either use a verbal statement giving the amount of the raise or put the chips into the pot in a single motion. Otherwise, it is a string bet.

When playing tournament poker, you have two choices when raising ... You can verbally state the amount of your raise - "I raise to $2000". You may then make numerous forward motions with your hands. You may place $100 worth of chips into the pot, then another $1000 in chips into the pot, and finally another $900 in chips into the pot to complete your raise to $2,000.
If you verbally state "raise" without stating an amount, or if you don't say anything and instead simply move poker chips into the pot - you must place all your chips (your entire raise) into the pot in one forward motion, you cannot make more than one forward motion with your hands.

What is 'forward motion'?
A betting line is a line that is painted on the poker table felt about 6-12 inches in front of each player. Any poker chips that a player moves past the betting line are considered to be part of a bet and are now in the pot. Most poker tables do not display the betting line and on racetrack poker tables, the betting line is sometimes considered to be where the wood meets the poker cloth.

On tables that do not show a betting line, any chips that are moved in a forward motion towards the pot are considered to be part of a bet and are now in the pot. Every player has personal space on the table directly in front of his seat. You may place chips from your main stack into your personal space and then stack and move chips back and forth between your main stack and the chips in your personal space - but as soon as you make a forward motion from your personal space, your chips are considered to be in the pot.

Exception: A player will sometimes announce raise and then move forward only enough chips to cover the amount needed to call. The dealer will then scoop every player's call chips into the pot. The raising player must then place additional chips into the pot, equal to the amount of his raise. This 'double forward motion' makes it easier for the dealer to keep track of the chips in the pot.

The Terminator

Well, the return of Wes was less than stellar. For Wes at least. And the crowd I expected didn't materialize, so the points were less than anticipated. We did have some good poker, however, and while Crystal didn't have a spectacular performance, she did improve over her last outing at TNP. So, let's break it down.

TABLE 1
Stevie
Tanner
Deb
Jake

Table 2
Crystal
Wes
Jeff
Nick
Markus

Final Table
Deb
Tanner
Stevie
Nick
Jeff
Markus
Crystal

Continuing a slump he started last week, Jake was the first out and earned 1 point.

Certainly not the triumphant return he desired, Wes was out second and debuted on TNP with 2 points. His good hands were simply bettered, mostly by me.

With Deb & I gunning for Tanner, not to mention Stevie's desire to close the gap, Mr. T had a contract out on him and last night he was delivered an early dismissal and left the game with 3 points.

While her boobs re-inflated just a bit, Crystal was still disappointed with her 6th place finish. Still, her 4 points did put her ahead of Jake and inching ever closer to Adam.

Markus' game has done nothing but improve since his heads up tournament turn around, so his 5th place finish, including 5 points, helped seperate him from Justin.

Nick came in with a foul mood, after having yet another tough day at school. His stop at Cactus Bar did little to ameliorate his spirits. Still, he played well and garnered 6 points to pull ahead of Adam by 3.

I made the top 3, but ran out of gas at the end. My 6 points did help keep me close to the front runner however.

The heads up came down to Deb & Stevie. Honestly, when the final 2 started their match, I simply knew that Deb had it wrapped up. Her chip lead was slight, but the first dozen hands she won easily as her cards were good enough to raise pre flop and call any raise Stevie offered. About mid way through the contest, however, her luck turned south, fast and hard, and Stevie fought back from near elimination to win the night. Deb won 9 points for her efforts, however, and remained in first place.

Having terminated Nick with a full house against Nick's 2 pair, including pocket aces, and his fantastic performance against Deb in the heads up, Stevie's 11 points pull him to within 11 points of Tanner. So the top 3 behind Deb are all within grasp of the pinnacle of the stats board. Here's the break down.

9. Jake - 1
8. Wes - 2
7. Tanner - 3
6. Crystal - 4
5. Markus - 5
4. Nick - 6
3. Jeff - 7
2. Deb - 9
1. Stevie - 11

So while the expected crowd didn't come through, Stevie is satisfied with the results and has his sights set on Tanner, in more ways than one! So until the next chapter of TNP is written, may all your cards be live and your pots be monsters!




This weeks winner!

Full House!

At least that's what we're expecting tonight. With the return of the Vegas vagabonds, the addition of Wes and our regular crew expected, it'll be a full house with lots of points on the line. Adam will be LOST, but other than that, the rest of our TNP regulars should be on hand for some intense poker. Will Nick surpass Adam? Will Deb retain first place for 3 weeks in a row? Can Tanner overtake second, or even first place? How close will Stevie come to Tanner? Can Crystal end her streak of bad luck and rejoin Adam & Nick for the biggest boob contest, or will she be stuck dealing with Shane & Jake? How will the tie breaker between Markus & Justin turn out? Can Mark get away from work to end his time in the basement and make it a contest between he and Justin again? How much impact will Wes have and how many points can he harvest for his first game at TNP this year? There hasn't been this much excitement since the screening of "The Perils of Pauline"! Tune in tomorrow for the answers to these and many more questions as the next installment of The Admiral's Poker Challenge, Thursday Night Poker unfolds tonight!

Welcome Back Kotter

Yep, this Thursday marks the return of Wes to the poker table at TNP. With lots on the line, the addition of this maverick player will certainly put a new dimension in the game and cause some concern for the front runners. Don't miss this Thursday's installment as it promises to be one for the books!

On the horizon......

I know this is a little early, but the monthly meal for June, which we'll have on the 5th, is grilled bar-b-que chicken and Deb's bringing baked potato salad from United. I thought some corn on the cob would be good to. We'll be celebrating anything worth celebrating, including but not limited to Adam's birthday. So another cookie cake would be nice to. According to Mark & Justin, Chad was the winner of the "who will bring home the most cash from Vegas" poll question. But even at that, it apparantly wasn't anything to write home about. Congrats anyway Chad!

Heard through the grapevine.....

I was able to pick up bits and pieces about an incident involving Deb at another poker game. Something about going through the deck until you find the best cards to win a hand after it's ended? If you have information concerning this incident, please post a comment and help set the record straight. In the mean time, keep a close eye on Deb when she's at your table!

Processing the Prognosticators Polls

Ok, let's see how well we did this week.

Deb remains #1, got that one.

Stevie didn't 3-peat, nailed that one.

It's yet to be determined who scored big in Vegas, I'll get back to ya on that one. Just so I won't forget, the polls split between Mark, Justin & Chad with 4 votes each. Poor Crystal only garnered 1 vote. Why is everyone so against Crystal?

Adam probably could have won last night, based on his chip stack when he left. But he got LOST so this one is null and void.

Markus & Jake did indeed play before the sun set. They kept talking about "punishment". SHUDDER Dam gays!

And it looks like, the majority having voted in the affirmative, we will indeed continue the heads up tournament, only once a quarter instead of once a month. The first being held on May 1, our next will be some time in July.

That's all for now. If there is a poker issue you'd like our prolific pontificators to ponder, or if there is a burning question you'd like expounded upon by our ecclesiastical existentialists, feel free to leave a comment and I'll be sure to present your query to our quorum.

The Butterfly Effect

Well, since we finished so early, I'll post this tonight instead of waiting until the morning. Even though we had 3 regulars missing from the table, we still had a sizable crowd and 12 points on the line. Tanner's recent surge has us all feeling a little dejavue. Here's how it played out.

On a technicality, Adam was first out tonight. Kinda. He showed up to play until LOST started. He was having a great night, continuing his streak of great hands he'd started on his online game, including quads and straight flushes. When it came time for him to leave, he asked that his blinds be posted until they ran out. Now, we did this for Markus & Jake, who were on their way but running late. We agreed to post Adam's blinds until a point of order was raised. In the past, when a player leaves the game, not just for a break or to take a phone call, but physically leaves the premisis, their chips are boxed and they're considered out. This has happened on several occasions previously and it was decided to follow that precedent. He had built up quite a chip lead and could have lasted longer than the 2 people who had been put out since he departed. Therefore, according to house rules, Adam ended the night with 1 point.

Next out was a new comer to the game, John, friend of Shane, and he made his TNP deput with 2 points.

Next out was a bit of a surprise. Unable to capitalize on his strong performance from last week, Jake was out next with 3 points much to the delight of Markus!

Nick made an early exit this week, coming closer to Adam and putting a little more distance between him and Crystal.

Next out was Shane, making the final table and ending the night with 5 points.

Stevie, holding out as long as he could, left the table with 6 points.

Markus, building on the momentum he started last week against Crystal, finished in the top 4 with 7 points.

Deb made the final 3, insuring her cling to first place, and added 8 points. ADDENDUM How could I forget to mention Deb's STRAIGHT FLUSH! She took quite a few chips from Jake on this hand, and it helped to make up for her mis-read on a straight earlier in the night. Don't forget the JACK Deb!

Had I finished in first, I could have tied Deb once again for first, but Tanner's chip lead was humongous, and I had to settle for second place in the standings with 10 points.

Making the winners circle once again, adding 12 points and his 5th win for the year, Tanner has managed to climb back into contention for first place. Looking back at the games, had Tanner not missed 4, he very likely would still be in first place after dominating the first quarter of the year. Here's the break down.

10. Adam - 0
9. John - 2
8. Jake - 3
7. Nick - 4
6. Shane - 5
5. Stevie - 6
4. Markus - 7
3. Deb - 8
2. Jeff - 10
1. Tanner - 12

Next week Crystal, Justin & Mark should be back to play and we'll see how their return will affect the stats. Until then, may all your cards be live and your pots be monsters.

Per his request, Adam's point has been removed. All other points remain.

Viva Las Vegas!

Well, still no word from our intrepid foursome visiting Las Vegas. That means they're either losing bad or have won so big they're wanting to surprise everyone when they return home. However they're doing, we do know they won't be here for poker tomorrow, and Adam will be LOST again, so this gives Nick an opportunity to close in on Adam and put further distance between him and Crystal. This will also mean fewer points up for grabs, so those who do show won't have as big a piece of pie as we've had the past few weeks. Still, for some, not a lot of points are needed to make a move. So, until tomorrow at 7:30, may all your cards be live and your pots be monsters!

According to the polls......

With the results tallied and the official record entered, let's take a look back and see how well the polls were in predicting this weeks outcome, starting with......

Well, the polls missed this one. Deb did indeed overtake me to assume sole possession of first place.

It's not even cool in hell yet, so this one seems to be intact for the forseeable future.

Stevie, having not only placed a bid on a house, but has also consulted a surgeon about rhino-plasty, seems on the verge of making both these questions affirmative.

Markus, by the skin of his teeth, aided by a HORRIBLE night for Crystal, has exited the cellar and was not first out last night.

Crystal's tettas not only have deflated, they've disappeared altogether. She may have to start stuffing a training bra just to keep up appearances.

Tanner doesn't paint, he draws. But he is planning on taking painting lessons. So this question is thrown out on a technicality.

And while the pollsters did miss the final winner, it came close to picking the final two players to win the tourney, only Stevie came out on top instead of Adam.

New poll questions will be posted soon.

And then there was one...

After almost six hours of heads-up poker Thursday, we finally narrowed the field from 11 to 1. Here's a round by round recap.

First Round

#8 Justin vs. #9 Markus
In a marathon match, Justin secured a roof over his head for the night by defeating Markus 2-1. Justin won the first, followed by a Markus win to set up the first rubber game of the tournament. In a game marred by distractions (Mark's calls and smoke breaks), and both players refusal to die, "Taps" finally played for Markus after going all-in against Justin's pocket aces.

#7 Adam vs. #10 Crystal
In one of the first rivalry matchups, Adam swept Crystal out of the championship bracket at the featured table 2-0. After a Game 1 win, Adam delivered the critical strike in Game 2, when Crystal caught the top flush against a full house. It catapulted Adam into the second round, and sent Crystal into a spiral for the rest of the night.

#6 Deb vs. #11 Shane
Deb brought Shane into this world, and she wasted no time taking him out of this tournament. Deb made sure that all of the higher seeds won their first round matches by sweeping Shane 2-0. The win set up the highly anticipated matchup between Deb and Tanner in the second round.

Second Round

#1 Stevie vs. #8 Justin
Justin almost pulled off the upset of the tournament, but in the end it was the top-seed in the tournament advancing to the semifinals. Stevie won the first, but lost the second to set up the third and decisive game. Very shortly into Game 3, Justin drew top pair, but Stevie had two pair and went all-in. Stevie's hand held up, and he survived with a 2-1 win.

#4 Jeff vs. #5 Jake
Jake used a series of big hands to easily eliminate the host of the tournament. Jake surprised many, including himself, by sweeping Jeff 2-0. Jeff was able to avoid elimination for a while in Game 2, but eventually the massive chip leader was able to punch his ticket into the semifinals. Jake's reward was a date with Stevie. Hope Markus and Tanner won't mind!

#2 Nick vs. #7 Adam
Despite frequent shuffling errors, and the fact that there were four boobs at one table, Adam was able to upset Nick 2-0. Fortunately for Nick, his efforts from a week ago kept his rank respectable, and would keep him ahead of Crystal for the week. For Adam, it was a clean sweep and a perfect 4-0 record headed to the semifinals.

#3 Tanner vs. #6 Deb
In the game that everyone was eagerly waiting for all week, Tanner and Deb delivered a true classic. Game 1 went to Tanner, but Deb came back to win Game 2. The third game was back and forth, but in the end it was Deb advancing to play Adam in the semifinals. For Tanner, it was off to join Nick and Justin in the 5th-7th place game.

Semifinals

#1 Stevie vs. #5 Jake
After a lengthy delay, Jake finally got to play his second game, and he drew the number one seed, Stevie. Jake couldn't knock the rust off, and Stevie was able to storm into the championship game, 2-0. The night was getting late, but Stevie was ready to take his 4-1 heads-up record into the "Poker After Dark" championship!

#6 Deb vs. #7 Adam
In a game of two players with a lot of momentum, Adam was able to win his 3rd straight match to advance to the championship, 2-1. Both players had already won 2 matches coming into the semifinal. Adam was 4-0 coming in, while Deb had just won a thriller against Tanner. Adam won the first, but was dealt his first loss of the tournament in Game 2. But a club flush on the river in Game 3 was enough to set up the Adam/Stevie showdown.

Championship

#1 Stevie vs. #7 Adam
In a championship match that started at about 12:30 Friday morning, it was a grueling third game that finally gave us our champion. Adam won the first game, but as soon as the timer was reset for Game 2, both players were already all-in. Stevie's full house on the river gave him the win over Adam's two pair, setting up a classic third game. The chips swung back and forth, but in the end Adam's straight draw didn't hit, and Stevie was crowned the first ever heads-up tournament champion, 2-1.

In other consolation matches, Deb beat Jake to finish 3rd. Justin won the 5th place game, with Tanner 6th and Nick 7th. Jeff won the 8th place bracket by beating Shane. And Markus was finally able to climb out of the cellar by beating Crystal for 10th.

The final results:

1. Stevie - 13 points
2. Adam - 11 points
3. Deb - 9 points
4. Jake - 8 points
5. Justin - 7 points
6. Tanner - 6 points
7. Nick - 5 points
8. Jeff - 4 points
9. Shane - 3 points
10. Markus - 2 points
11. Crystal - 1 point

Showdown at the OK Corral

Well, the dust has settled, the points awarded. Look for Adam to post the narrative later on today. The stats are posted, and we have a new marshal in town. See you all next week at the Admiral's Poker Challenge, Thursday Night Poker!

Mono y Mono

Tonight, it's one on one. The action will be fast and furious! Strategies for heads up testing the mettle of each player. Odds on favorite, at least as far as the poll is concerned, is Adam. Time will shortly tell. And, concerning our next variation of TNP, since we've done TOD and STD, how bout we do STRIP next?